The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock: Radio Edit Version

I must admit, this post really has nothing to do with T.S. Elliot, and I bet you are all heartily disappointed. The title just came to me in the middle of the night, and I couldn't resist. As we are all well aware, I am too illiterate to create a post that can live up to such a title and I apologize. When I was musing on the subject in the middle of the night, I thought I was so very clever, "ha ha ha," thought I to myself, "I will write the so called "radio edit" of this wonderful poem and everyone will think that I am so witty and clever." However, upon awakening the next morning, I remembered that I have a rather small alotment of literary skill and that it was too vast an undertaking for one such as I. But, it is a choice poem, and I highly recomend that you check it out. But before I say adieu, I must force a few of my favorite lines upon you because my guess is that you are too lazy to read the entirety in its length. (Does it shock you how well I know you?)

And indeed there will be time

To wonder, “Do I dare?” and, “Do I dare?”

Time to turn back and descend the stair,

With a bald spot in the middle of my hair—

[They will say: “How his hair is growing thin!”]

My morning coat, my collar mounting firmly to the chin,

My necktie rich and modest, but asserted by a simple pin—

[They will say: “But how his arms and legs are thin!”]

Do I dare

Disturb the universe?

In a minute there is time

For decisions and revisions which a minute will reverse.


For I have known them all already, known them all:—

Have known the evenings, mornings, afternoons,

I have measured out my life with coffee spoons;

I know the voices dying with a dying fall

Beneath the music from a farther room.

So how should I presume?

I just love that "I have measured out my life with coffee spoons" and my guess is that you know me well enough to surmise that I am not one to undervalue baldspots.

As my parting gift to you, I will let you know that when I grow old, I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled.

Don't you just love the English language?

Yeah, He's Gotta Be Hot

With the fast approaching nuptials of my two dear sisters, I have had marriage on the brain, I guess. It's a big step, and a very important decision, this I know. So, after Bro. what's-his-name told us about his daughters making lists of the qualities they wanted in their future spouses, I decided to do just that. The following is a comprehensive list of the must-have traits of my future husband.

1. First, I need someone who gets me...a pretty hard task to accomplish as I don't even get me. Even so, it's essential.

2. Next, I really need someone with good dental hygene. It's just a must.

3. We all know the importance of interest compatibilities, so obviously I will need to marry someone who blogs.

4. Another thing that I require in my future spouse is man hands. I know that I shouldn't begrudge people the look of their hands, as they can't really help it, but guys with women hands just give me the willies.

5. I also need someone that will buy me Dance Dance Revolution and let me win on a regular basis. He's gotta have moves, but not let on that he does. you know?

6. He must also be almost attractive as the fine specimin below. Hard to accomplish, I know, but a girls got to have standards, and this is mine.



7. I think that another essential part of maintaining a good relationship is sharing things. My future husband better be very generous, becuase by sharing things, I mean giving me things.

8.Any husband of mine has got to have a prestigious job. For instance, he could be a toy tester, or work for Crest Toothpaste, Covenant publishing, or something like that. I'm not going to marry a nobody!

Yep, I think that about covers it.

You think I'm asking a lot, don't you? Well, that may be the case, but I just know there's someone out there that's up to scratch and meant just for me. I know it.

I Love Lappytops!